It’s that time again: registration time. The time to meet with your advisor, to get depressed about how much longer you have to be in school and to stress out about trying to get all of your classes before they are full.
Every student has to go through this, and it’s just as difficult for everyone else to not want to drop out altogether. Here are the thoughts every student has when registering for classes.
Maybe this time the website won’t freeze and ruin my life.
It happens every time. Every student on Earth logs into Nighthawk Registration at the EXACT. SAME. TIME. The website can’t handle this much attention. So, it has a major breakdown, literally, and freezes up. It’s not like we’re in the 21st century with amazing technology that should stop things like this from happening… The internet just hates you. And in that moment, you are convinced the end is near.
I WILL get into that full class, no matter what it takes.
There is always that one class that fills up in 0.2 seconds with only 15 spots available. You have tried three semesters in a row to sign up before it fills up. You have been put on the waitlist time and time again, but, with no avail. Maybe, JUST maybe, fourth time will be the charm.
But why is the worst professor the only one teaching the one class I need?
Is the devil’s spawn really the only professor capable of teaching this class? There has got to be another way, another professor. There is no way in hell you will be able to get through a whole semester with them. No amount of effort or strength will carry you through this class, let alone with a decent grade. Why is God punishing you?
Why didn’t I plan this out ahead of time?
Now you’re floundering trying to find backup classes that aren’t already full. You always tell yourself you’re going to make a game plan and rock this registration, but you don’t. You see everyone else with their beautifully organized planners with every class written down in sickeningly perfect handwriting, highlighted and all. Why can’t you be more like them? Why must you bring dishonor to your family? Well, you let yourself down. Again.
Something more scary than that terrible professor: EVENING CLASSES.
Why must this one class only be offered from 6-8 p.m. on a Monday? Don’t they know Monday’s are the worst days of the week? You don’t even want to get out of bed Mondays, let alone be in a class for two hours. You’d much rather be out getting drinks to celebrate even making it to Monday. College, why are you ruining your life? You have been nothing but a half-decent student with okay grades. You probably haven’t been faithfully showing up for all of classes, but…still. You don’t deserve this.
Hey, don’t worry though. One day, a long, long time from now, you will never have to register for classes again. Can you imagine it?